How To: Worry About Yourself

I made a mistake. If you ask me how I got to the place I am at now, or what brought me closer to God, regardless of what point in my life I am referencing, it will always start off with a decision I made that was contrary to a directive that God clearly gave me. Either I was feeling myself too much, or I didn’t want to take a road that I couldn’t see the end of, but whatever the reasoning, there are times when I make choices based solely on what I want to do; even though I know I should not be doing them. A lot of times, I look at where I am, or what I have, and allow myself to wonder why my life can’t be like whoever I am comparing myself to at the moment. And if ¬†left unchecked, the thought can fester and turn into a long series of self-loathing conversations between myself and God, mostly with me asking Him why He didn’t just stop me from doing this or that. It can get pretty ugly.

Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.

– James 1:2-4

I have often struggled in the past with thinking about how my life could have been like “this person” or “that person” if I had just done one thing or another differently. It took me forever to realize that my story, and the things that I have had to endure, suffer through, and recover from are what make me who I am today. To realize that if I spent less time thinking about how my life could have been like someone else’s, and more time exploring how all the pieces of my life fit together, then I would be able to see how prevalent God’s love has been in every moment in my life. The truth is I had to spend time considering that what has worked for others would not work for me because I was specifically designed to be me, and only then did I learn that the details of how my life glorifies God will not look like anyone else’s.The way I have to learn certain lessons will not be the same as everyone else. The stories I will have to tell to help someone see what faith can do will not be the same as someone else. And I am okay with that. I have grown to be okay with focusing, daily, on what God tells me or places on my heart, regardless of what I (or anyone else) thinks should be going on in my life. I must trust that if I diligently seek God, He will lead me in the direction that is will created a life lived to bring Him the most glory.

On this Monday, I have 2 songs for you. As you listen to them, I pray that your week is filled with ample opportunities for you to live out the life that God created you for. May your week be well and productive. Happy Monday!

Blessed is the man who remains steadfast under trial, for when he has stood the test he will receive the crown of life, which God has promised to those who love him. – James 1:12

Grace and peace